Sure there’s software like that. It’s called malware and it’s been around for years.
Become a Patron of Ask Leo! and go ad-free!
Malware
The basic ideas is this: malicious software gets installed on your computer. It reports back to someone else what it is you’re doing.
It’s like the classic definition of what we call spyware. Spyware installed on your machine can basically track anything. Heck, more general malware on your machine can not just track anything but it can do anything.
Now if you’re thinking "Isn’t that just the same as viruses and such?," you’d be exactly right. That’s exactly what this is: viruses and spyware and generally malicious software installed on your machine.
And you already know the way to prevent this and how to cure it: good internet habits. Don’t download and run things you don’t know are 100% safe; don’t open attachments that you don’t know are 100% safe. Run up-to-date anti-malware tools: the usual litany of things that we keep telling people to do to keep themselves safe on the internet.
Spying without malware
Now, if your question is really "can someone spy on your online communications without installing things on your computer?" then in the general sense, the answer is no.
If they gained access to your router, maybe. If they’re the NSA and they have access to your ISP, maybe.
But in general, no, random people can not intercept your mail, and the same is generally true for texts.
The question also mentioned a suspicious spouse. Anyone who has physical (hands on) access to your computer can install this kind of malware. If they are computer savvy they could even do this if your Windows login is password protected.
Agreed, Mark, that “physical (hands on)” is the most obvious in the circumstances you describe.
But there are also the various versions of “Remote Log-in”, that effectively give a similar degree of access.
I mentioned the hands on approach in addition to any possible remote attacks as it would be the easiest way for a spouse who wasn’t particularly computer savvy to get into the system by installing keyloggers and/or other spyware.
If your emails and texts are being monitored by a suspicious spouse or some other suspicious/possessive relative, you might try the drastic measure of providing cleanskin devices as a work-around to cocoon/buffer communication with children, spouse and/or former spouse.
You might consider the expense of providing each party with a fresh smart phone on a fresh plan paid for by you, that is dedicated to the purpose of only communicating among each other, so the expense is not dissimilar to the current status. No other phones nor computers are to be used for communication among yourselves.
You could set up cleanskin gmail accounts for each of you and provide each Family member with their username and password, which you will keep and log in to run scans. Gmail also shows account activity in the lower right hand corner, so it is possible to check if the email address has been used by a third party. You should be the only one to delete the email communications to ensure they were not forwarded prior to deletion.
Since the communications and methods are only between each of you, there is no privacy infringement and no grounds for complaint, as no third parties are involved. The priority and purpose is to protect children from being monitored and gather evidence if they are.
I have a stalker and it is important to continue to research and ask questions, change internet behaviour, change computer settings, purchase anti-malware and anti-spyware just to keep up pace with whacking the mole. The mole is winning, but I feel safer and better equipped than I once did. I am not deterred by my stalker from doing my research to improve my safety.
Leo is working on publishing more on how to stay safe on the internet and I am very much looking forward to it. This is a wonderful site and extremely helpful.
There are further articles on AskLeo! relating to Malware, Spyware and Tracking that are worthwhile reading and research.
For children, there are also good articles on here about cyber-bullying.
Anyone who lacks the ethics and makes the effort to install Malware is likely to utilise other forms, so more than just Anti-Malware is necessary.
Spyware is different from Malware and needs to be addressed differently or rather, addressed additionally. There are good software programs, but no single program will address everything. Even one Anti-Malware program won’t address all Malware. Once installed, the settings each need to be properly adjusted, then the databases need to be updated frequently. -It may seem overwhelming, but it’s easier as you gain experience, and a lot easier when you can research in a safe, trustworthy website like AskLeo.com.
It’s important to research thoroughly on this website first before taking any downloading activities or becoming disheartened.
Once you gain a basic understanding of what is happening or can happen to you, you can research the cause or ask the question, then you can research the protective measure that needs to be taken.
I can’t control what another person does to me, but I can limit their impact and I have done.
Online security can be fairly ethereal, but basic practical measures can help. Relying on any one or two measures is not enough, changes in software, security settings and behaviour need to occur. Leo has a lot of intelligent advice on here and it is worthwhile to sit down and regularly read through the articles because it does raise awareness.
I wish AskLeo.com had been the first website that I visited when I initially went online. I am so grateful that Leo provides this service to the online community.